


Understanding

by CatHeights



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Episode Related, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-06-04
Updated: 2006-06-04
Packaged: 2017-10-05 15:26:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CatHeights/pseuds/CatHeights
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Not all scars are visible. The story references events from <i>Trinity</i>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Understanding

  
_Sweat trickles down his face, rivulets of heat scorching instead of cooling skin. He ignores the pain. He can do this. He won't be distracted. _

_Collins leans over the console, the burnt mess of what was once his fingers make a wet, sucking sound as they stick to the surface. _

_"Stop that," Rodney says, not looking up. "I'm going to make this right. Your death won't be pointless. I can make this work." _

_"No you can't." _

_That voice doesn't belong to Collins. Rodney's head snaps up to meet Sheppard's glare. Bile catches in his throat as he takes in the burns on the Colonel's face. _

_"You stayed too fucking long, Rodney. I told you it was time to leave." _

_"No. I can make this right. I can do this." _

_Sheppard's hands dig into his shoulder, burning right through his jacket. He tries to twist away, but that grip is relentless. "Trust me," Rodney screams as the fireball rips toward them. _

"McKay. Wake up."

Something wet and mercifully cool is placed on his forehead, and then he can feel the same dampness being spread onto his arms. Rodney wishes he could get some of the dampness inside of him to douse the fireball that's trapped in his lungs.

"Rodney."

The voice is low and gruff, but he can hear the concern in it. In response, he forces heavy eyelids to open. "Ronon?"

"Yeah."

Ronon slides an arm beneath him, helping him to sit up. "Drink."

The cup against his lips feels cool, but the liquid inside is even cooler. Rodney swallows it eagerly. After a few moments, Ronon pulls the cup away and lowers him back to the bed. "Thanks," Rodney says. "Doranda?"

"What?"

"Are we on Doranda?"

"No." Ronon's fingers brush across the top of the cloth. "We're on Falausia. You caught a fever — bloodfire. It's a childhood disease."

"I'm not a child."

Ronon's deep chuckle spreads over him as soothing as the damp cloth. "No, you're not, but you caught it anyway."

"Lucky me." Rodney closes his eyes. "Is this my fault?"

"No. You're sick. It's no one's fault. Go back to sleep. You'll be fine in a few days."

"Stay?" Rodney tries to reach out a hand, but his body isn't obeying his commands.

Ronon gets it anyway, wrapping his hand around Rodney's. "I'll be here."

"Good," Rodney whispers. That's very, very good, he thinks, as he drifts back to sleep.

*~*~*~*~*~

  
The fever flushing Rodney's skin makes the faded scar on his arm more visible. Ronon knows all about that scar. He's heard the stories about the Genii — their sneaky ways, poorly designed nuclear weapons, and rather short life expectancy. When the topic comes up, he's seen the remembered rage in Sheppard's eyes and heard the defiant waver in McKay's voice.

Ronon runs his hand along Rodney's arm. Yes, he understands this scar.

But it's not this scar that Rodney has nightmares about. It's not this scar that torments his fevered brain. Doranda left no physical marks on Rodney, but Ronon knows not all scars are visible. The failed effort to power-up that weapon is the one topic McKay won't discuss. Any attempt is met with a wave of a hand and a "Busy, right now." Even after a nightmare, Rodney will say nothing. He just turns on his side and mutters, "I'm tired."

Trying to get something out of Sheppard is no better. But Ronon's learned that there are many things Sheppard won't discuss. So, he's left it be. Things either heal, or you live with them. But sometimes, he wonders if Doranda is more an infected wound than a fading scar.

He hears the sound of footsteps coming down the hall. Ronon knows that tread — Sheppard. After making sure McKay is calm for the moment, he goes over to the doorway and leans against it.

The dim lighting in the hallway casts shadows on the battered gray walls. This place is weary. It reeks of fear and despair. Ronon wishes he was on the surface, but this is where McKay is, so this is where he needs to be. A few more seconds pass before Sheppard comes into view.

"I wish I had your hearing," Sheppard mumbles with a shake of his head. Indicating the room, he asks, "How is he?"

"The same. You shouldn't be here."

"I've already been exposed," Sheppard says with a shrug and a shake of his head. "I wish I'd known those kids were infected time bombs."

Ronon winces, thinking how he had shared Teyla and Sheppard's amusement at Rodney's horrified squawk when a little girl had run over and hugged his leg. Later when he heard mention of children coming down with the bloodfire, he thought nothing of it. All children got the bloodfire. It never occurred to him that Sheppard and McKay would not have had this illness as children too.

"I should have said something sooner."

"You couldn't have known." Sheppard runs a hand through his hair. "Besides, by the time you'd heard about the outbreak, we'd already been exposed. If only the Gate…."

Sheppard doesn't finish his sentence, but Ronon knows what he was going to say — if only the Gate had connected. When the skies had turned dark, flashes of light flickering amongst the clouds, Darick, the clan leader, had hurried them underground into this bunker. He'd said the electrical storms were fierce this time of year, destroying much in their path.

At first it seemed the worst thing about the situation was that they would miss their assigned check-in time with Atlantis. Not a huge deal. It'd happened before. But as they waited out the storm, McKay began to complain about his arms burning. Not too long afterward, most of his body was flushed, and he was curled up on a bed, mind muddled with fever.

The storm continued for much of that day and into the next. When it finally ended, Sheppard and Teyla headed for the Ring to contact Atlantis and let them know about McKay's illness. It was hours before they returned with the news that something was wrong — the Gate wouldn't connect.

"He woke for a bit. I got him to drink the medicine Teyla mixed," Ronon says. He turns to look back into the room, but McKay is still sleeping quietly.

Sheppard makes a face. "Did he complain?"

"No. I put it to his mouth and he drank it, all of it."

"Okay, that's not good. With the way that stuff smelled, you should have had a fight on your hands." Sheppard took a deep breath. "But he drank it, and that's good. He'll be fine. The fever will break, and then he can figure out what the hell got fried in the dialing device, and we'll all go home."

"When he woke, he didn't know where he was." Ronon pauses, wondering if he should keep the next bit to himself. Sheppard already has enough on his mind, but the memory of McKay crying out in his sleep is still too fresh. He's seen the tension that pops up now and then between Sheppard and McKay and witnessed the nightmares McKay has after those exchanges. He wants to know where Sheppard stands. "He asked if he was on Doranda."

"Oh," Sheppard says. There's no flash of anger in Sheppard's eyes, only concern and maybe even guilt.

Sheppard's reaction reassures Ronon some. The wound that is Doranda will heal. Sheppard's people just take their time with everything.

"I should check on him." Sheppard's mouth is set in a tight line.

Ronon blocks his way. "No. He's still contagious. You haven't had the bloodfire."

Sheppard crosses his arms and looks toward the ceiling for a few moments. When he returns his gaze to Ronon's face, he says, "You know, if you want to take a break, Teyla or one of the villagers can sit with him for a bit."

"I'm fine. He asked me to stay."

Sheppard stares at him for a moment and then nods. Ronon wonders if Sheppard knows about him and McKay. He doesn't care. He'd tell Sheppard himself, except people on Atlantis have strange taboos, many of them surrounding sex. He's not sure if mentioning to Sheppard that he's sleeping with McKay would be breaking one of those taboos.

"I'll check back later, and Teyla should be by in an hour, so if you change your mind, just let us know. I'm going to go poke at the DHD and see if I can get it to work. Stranger things have happened."

"Okay." Ronon watches Sheppard leave and then returns to the room.

He removes the cloth from Rodney's forehead, wets and replaces it. Rodney mumbles something, hand twisting in the sheet. Ronon carefully sits on the bed and takes Rodney's hand in his. There's a soft sigh, and Rodney quiets.

*~*~*~*~*~

  
Why does his head feel like he's had far too many shots of really bad vodka? With a groan, Rodney puts a hand to his forehead.

"You're awake," Ronon says.

Rodney cautiously opens his eyes. "Obviously. Do I want to know why I feel like I have the galaxy's worst hangover?"

"You caught the bloodfire."

Rodney groans again. "Oh yes, the virulent, clingy children. How could I forget? On future missions would it be too much to ask for someone to keep small runts away from me?"

"I'll keep them away."

The fierceness in Ronon's voice stuns Rodney. "Uh, thanks. You don't need to take any extreme measures, though, okay?" 

Ronon nods, but he doesn't look any less serious. Concerned, Rodney reaches out and rubs Ronon's arm. There, that got him a smile, and he can't help smiling back. He loves the way Ronon's face lights up when he smiles. It's such a contrast to the fierce expression he often wears.

"Not that I'm complaining. But why are we still here? Shouldn't I be waking once again in Carson's care?"

"The storm affected the DHD. The Gate won't dial."

Rodney's eyes widen. "What?" He slides down the bed.

"What are you doing?"

"What do you think I'm doing? Going to look at the DHD. Did lightning strike it? Are you sure the problem is with the DHD or is it the Gate that's malfunctioning?"

"I don't know. Sheppard said something about the DHD." Ronon puts a hand on McKay's arm. "You're not going anywhere."

"Of course I am," Rodney says as he gets to his feet. The room sways, giving him a funhouse feeling. He's never liked funhouses, all those bizarre mirrors. "And I'm sure Sheppard couldn't leave well enough alone. He probably had to poke at it. God only knows what additional damage he's inflicted."

He takes another step, and then his knees buckle. Ronon's arm instantly goes around his waist, keeping him upright. "No, I need to get to the Gate," he says as Ronon guides him back to bed, but the moment his head touches the pillow, exhaustion is already trying to force his eyes closed.

"Sleep," Ronon says. "You can yell at people later."

Rodney smiles and yawns. It's nice to be known so well. He supposes yelling at Sheppard can wait a few hours.

Lips touch his, and Rodney finds enough energy to respond, coaxing Ronon into a longer kiss. This is all still so new. There's such a rush to it. He wishes he weren't so tired.

As Ronon pulls away, Rodney remembers the first time they kissed. Ronon had such a fierce look on his face that Rodney feared he'd done something to piss the man off and was about to be plastered across the wall. But instead, Ronon kissed him and then asked, "Is this okay?" 

Thankfully, he was able to manage a "yes," because he really likes kissing Ronon. In fact, he's pretty sure he might like it for a long, long time to come.

"Sleep," Ronon says again.

Rodney closes his eyes, smile still on his face. "Fine. I'm sleeping." He yawns. "Yes, sleeping."

*~*~*~*~*~

  
"Of all the rotten luck," Rodney says as he runs his hand over the scorched DHD.

"Can you fix it?" Sheppard asks.

"Could you give me even a minute to actually take a look? What, do you think I can tell what's damaged just by touching it? That would be a nice trick."

"Sorry," Sheppard says, his tone sounding anything but sorry. "But I'd kind of like to go home."

"And I wouldn't?" Rodney says.

"Perhaps we should let you work," Teyla says. "Colonel, shall we?"

Ronon nods at Teyla. It's a good move on her part. Nothing good can come of Sheppard hanging around here.

"Okay, I can take a hint." Sheppard shrugs. "I'll back off and let McKay work. I know he'll fix this."

"Well, I'm glad you're so sure when I haven't even taken a look yet." Rodney glares at Sheppard. "If it can be fixed, I will fix it. But I can't work miracles, although I'm sure sometimes it might seem as if I do. Okay now, shouldn't you be going, so I can work?"

Unfazed, Sheppard smiles and says, "See you soon Rodney. Ronon." 

Teyla nods. "Come find us if you need our help with anything."

"Will do," Ronon says.

Once they're gone, McKay kneels in front of the DHD. "Can you keep an eye out for any curious villagers? I'm really not in the mood to be social."

"No problem." Ronon notices that Rodney's movements are jerky, his shoulders tense. "McKay?"

"I don't know why he's so sure I can fix this." Rodney doesn't look up.

"Because he trusts you."

Rodney goes still, and Ronon is sure he's about to get some version of the "I'm busy, work to do," line.

Instead, Rodney says softly, "Not anymore."

"You're wrong." Ronon moves so he's standing behind Rodney.

"Maybe." Rodney's voice holds no confidence.

"He does." Ronon rests a hand on Rodney's neck. "I trust you too."

Rodney reaches back and squeezes his hand. After a moment, he takes a deep breath and says, "Well, I still stand by my I can't work miracles stance, but let's see what's wrong here. You know in a few hours they'll be serving lunch on Atlantis. Hmmm. But I'm getting ahead of myself."

Ronon smiles as Rodney begins mumbling. The sound of McKay working is a good sound. He moves away slightly, ready to do his part and chase away any distractions.

They're home by lunch.


End file.
